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Mighty Mariner Week 2

By: The Mighty Mariner
Date: 05/09/2000

This week Grimsby Town's mascot the Mighty Mariner finds out that Alan Buckley has been sacked, and three days later who his replacement will be. The bad news on the injury front is that lack of practice of goal celebrating routines resulted in a sprained thumb for the mighty one.

The Mighty Mariner's Weekly Diary

Tues 22nd AugBlimey it's all happening. Buckley sacked! I don't think it affects me really. He never spoke to me ever. Carlisle tonight wasn't too bad at all. Nearly two thousand and most seemed pleased that AB was gone. Players were allowed to shoot today too. That made a change. We scored twice. I tried my celebration cartwheel and fell over. I think I've busted my thumb. Took half a bottle of whisky to ease pain and Girlfriend not impressed. She said I was a twit and cleared off again. Buckley AND the missus gone same day. Is this coincidence or careless?
Weds 23rdRumours rumours rumours. If half the managers I've heard touted for town today come true, we'll be in the premiership in two years. I shall sit here and dream I have the time. I've been sat here in casualty waiting for an X-ray on my humongously swollen thumb for three hours already.
Thurs 24thThumb is just sprained. Tell that to my thumb. It hurts like hell. I told the girlfriend and she's been to see me. Did the big soppy helpless male thing, you know, hang-dog bloodhound eyes and drooping mouth. Seemed to do the trick, she's moving back in to help me out. Must stop arguing.
Friday 25thLooks like Lennie Lawrence is the new man in town. I'll have to introduce myself tomorrow at the big game. Thought I might miss it but with the thumb strapped up it's fine. No fancy antics when town score though. (WHEN they score…who am I kidding?).
Sat 26thYup. Lennie the man was introduced to the crowd today and seemed to get a good cheer. More than I did though. Some smart assed kid told me I wasn't the real Mighty Mariner cos I'm 8 inches shorter than last years. I wish I was allowed to talk, I'd have told him where to go. Upstart. Town weren't too good either. Outplayed and outsung by Sheff Weds and their band. 0-2. I knew we wouldn't score. My thumb survived though.
Sun 27thDay in. Slept till 1 o' clock in the afternoon then slobbed about watching TV. Pure heaven.
Mon 28thBank holiday. Nowt to do. Missus says cut the grass. I cited my seriously damaged thumb and she pointed out it didn't stop my antics in bed last night, but if it's that bad may well stop them for the rest of the week. I cut the grass.

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