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The Dogs of Bore: Peterborough Report
By: Tony Butcher
A bright day with a cold, cold wind blowing through our souls and straight into the stand holding around 600 or so Town fans. Winter woollies a must, hats optional. The players warmed up as if theyâ€™d rather be somewhere else, somewhere else warm, which would be anywhere else really.
Peterborough United 0 Grimsby Town 0
Ooh look, another long throw! Ooh look, the Poshies managed to head the ball too, Arber rising like a soufflÃ© about 12 yards out to head nicely high and wide. The ball merely plopped on to the ground to the left of goal as Davison walked across to sign autographs for some small boys. Jevons! Twisting, turning, crossing, slump those shoulders, for nothing happened. Another Legg launch drooped to the far post and Arber, again, headed goalwards. Davison, clearly bored and wanting something to do to stop his brain seizing up, tipped the ball over the bar when he could have caught it easily. Can we just stop this nonsense, neither side is going to score. Letâ€™s save the planetâ€™s dwindling resources by turning off those floodlights right now.
Ooh, spoke too soon, a mistake by Cas as the ball was lumped behind him. A small Poshie barged him off the ball inside the area, to the right of goal, and pulled a short pass back to Woodlouse. Davison raced off his line to block the so called shot. The ball deflected up off Davisonâ€™s body, arched up near the post and two Town defenders wellied clear. Anymore for anymore? Thompson dragged a shot from outside the area several feet wide of Davisonâ€™s right hand post. In a normal game this wouldnâ€™t even be considered worthy of mention. It was a big highlight today. And then there was the big controversy of the first half, when Town only half cleared some lumpy stuff from the homesters. Legg, 20 yards out let fly as Hamilton slid across and completely miscued, slicing the ball over the bar. The referee gave a corner. The Town players were furious - how could anyone believe that Hamilton would touch the ball.
Cas had a shot, in the sense that his right boot wafted near the ball, the said inflatable then moved in the general direction of their goal and the Peterborough goalkeeper picked the ball up. That was Townâ€™s attack. That was the first half, that was a waste of everyoneâ€™s time and money.
Half time: Peterborough United 0 Grimsby Town 0
Why dignify that rubbish with analysis. Some spectators actually left at half time. Half the players could have and no-one would have noticed.
Stu's Half Time Toilet Talk
"Thatâ€™s not the kick-off time, itâ€™s the ticket price".
The report continues in the Second Half.
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