League Two Form Guide
Question of the Week
How much would you accept for Omar Bogle?
|Don't bite them!|
Bournemouth v Grimsby Preview
By: Alex Green
THAT’S it children, pack your bags grab your iPods, lunchboxes, books on the karma sutra, your Nintendo DS and your passport - we're going down south!
Not as special as it use to be of course: negative equity and the recession has made sure of that, gone have the juice bars, the shops selling surfboards and speedboats; actually I think the speedboat one shut when they stopped filming Bullseye. Nevertheless from what I've been told the south coast now looks like Immingham did in the 80’s. I can't wait to go to Mad Harry’s!
Now we all knew The Cherries were going to be in trouble financially sooner or later when they opened their new stadium and we found out they couldn't count. Nice stadium guys why is your goalie sitting on my car? But 3 stands won't stand in the way of those clever little southerners because they have used their noggins and are taking advantage of the dormant open top buses which they use during the summer season. They plan on parking 5 of them nose to tail and charging £21 for the lower deck and £15 for the terracing top deck that is why they are far more advanced and intelligent than us whippet-loving northerners.
*Cough* WAYNE BURNETT *Cough* Though they can trace their roots back to 1890 the fun didn't really start happening till 1923 thanks to some people who were obviously very bored of the pier after finding out ours was much superior. Boscombe FC (Where Dean’s Court is actually situated) had been kicking about since the aforementioned year of 1890 and after applying for election to Division 3 south decided to change their name to the catchy Bournemouth and Boscombe F.C. Now not much happened they went on a nice cup run in the mid 50’s losing to United. Most probably been 1-0 up and United been given 54 minutes injury time after the 90. Also used car sales men Harry Redknapp managed them after having played over the club for over 100 games and also because Harry can't really work further north then Oxford without getting a little dizzy he even chose Seattle instead of managing Derby because of it.
*Cough* GOLDEN GOAL *Cough* Rubbish! They got relegated according to their official site probably written by the same guy that does ours they nearly "preseerved their Keague 1 status" MaccaBilk would have a field day reading that! Anyway they didn't count their pennies and got a point reduction and went down in final game at Carlisle with 1,700 hardy souls following. Now that is one hell of a long journey home after you lose and get relegated! Oh and if you don't believe me on the spelling. http://www.afcb.co.uk/page/ClubHistory/0,,10324,00.html
*Cough* KINGSLEY BLACK *Cough* Could still be just as rubbish if everything goes wrong to pull themselves clear after 17 points is a great achievement but it was always going to be about survival and this weekend may just achieve that for them.
*Cough* WEMBLEY*Cough* It’s that bloody terrible looking northern club which ruined our day out! And they could ruin it again this weekend like they did in the 70’s as well. I don't think they like us much if I'm been honest.
*Cough* 1998 *Cough* I don't know I never met any of their lovely fans. I suppose being here is a good thing 17 points could have really have seen them sink to non league. Rumours are still rife about financial difficulties but Town are good now so I feel a lot more optimistic with everything again so sure I'm it will work itself out.
*Cough* Errrrrrr the volley that hit the stantion we all thought was in. What a goal that would have been I think we should have got points for creativity *Cough* If they can avoid relegation then it’s the first step in the right direction. Nice if they can build that other stand too and most importantly watch the pennies. Their motto should be The Thrifty Club because we're better then Leeds. Well it made sense in my head!
*Cough* they scored first but then we won hahaha *Cough* I don't care whoever is the one that causes the most problems but were good nowadays so it might not be anyone Hooray! Most probably though according to Soccerbase because I can't be bothered to research it will be their leading goalscorer Brett Pitman and although he has a name that makes him sound like he should be in Neighbours he actually looks half decent. He’s a month older then my brother Pete (21) and has 15 goals to his name all season. He’s been at Bournemouth since his preschool days and wears the number nine shirt which is nice for him. He got a hatrick against Rochdale at the start of April and he scored that weird loopy free kick at the start of the Chester game last Saturday.
My throat is sore I can't be bothered to cough anymore. So let’s get this right we need 2 points to avoid relegation. If Chester lose whatever happens that’s it the same if they draw as we have a much superior goal difference. A draw for us would be credible if Chester win but I don't want to go in to the last game needing to do anything my heart can't take it. If any of that it is incorrect then I'm sorry but you'll moan about it if I am anyway.
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