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Most Embarrassing GTFC Moments

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Bristol Mariner
January 14, 2021, 9:50pm

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I'm sure many clubs go through periods of turmoil, ups and downs etc but surely we must lead the way in embarrassing/cringeworthy moments.

Thought a list would be an idea just if anything else to think it can't get any worse - can it?

Like those awful channel 5 countdown programmes (ie top funniest football moments).

So to start the ball rolling here's a few that spring to mind, left a few out Could probably do a Fenty one all on it's own!

I'll do a poll in a week or so to find the number 1 most embarrassing GTFC moment.

1. Laws fracturing Bonetti's cheekbone with a plate of chicken
2. Fenty snapping a kids flag
3. Fenty accusing women of disguising tampons as fireworks
4. Newell's team of pissheads
5. Holloway playing darts during covid lockdown
6. Nick Dale not heeding police advise and we get £15k fine against Port Vale, far more than extra stewards would have cost
7. Board member Marley telling fans to shut up at an event designed to bring fans and club together






GTFC Exile, Bristol Mariners
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GrimRob
January 14, 2021, 9:51pm

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What about turning up an hour late for a game on national TV?


'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.  
~ Alfred Lord Tennyson

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Hagrid
January 14, 2021, 9:54pm

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Relegation from the football league. And doing it again
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Poojah
January 14, 2021, 9:58pm
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Quoted from GrimRob
What about turning up an hour late for a game on national TV?


What about not turning up at all for a game on national TV?


A smooth sea never made a skillful mariner.
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Abdul19
January 14, 2021, 10:00pm

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That Fenty BP video.


JESUS AT THE CENTRE
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promotion plaice
January 14, 2021, 10:02pm

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Not offering Podge the contract his goal scoring deserved.

Also

Didn't the team bus go to the wrong ground once or did I dream it?


When Leeds trainer Les Cocker was once told Norman Hunter had broken a leg, he asked: “Whose is it?”
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HertsGTFC
January 14, 2021, 10:04pm

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Someone going on 606 p1ssing themselves after he’d seen one of Nicky Laws side filling in a lottery ticket in a motorway service station after we’d been dicked somewhere.


"Crombie you would have got to that if you weren't such a fat ba%$@rd" - George Kerr, inspiration from the dug out 70s style  
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Azimuth
January 14, 2021, 10:05pm
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Releasing ballons assuming we were promoted with 5 minutes to play before it all went terribly wrong.
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MuddyWaters
January 14, 2021, 10:05pm
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The Fenty undercover interview. Just to add to the charge sheet.
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promotion plaice
January 14, 2021, 10:08pm

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The fallen Madonna with the big boobies.


When Leeds trainer Les Cocker was once told Norman Hunter had broken a leg, he asked: “Whose is it?”
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ginnywings
January 14, 2021, 10:12pm

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Ice bucket challenge.
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ginnywings
January 14, 2021, 10:13pm

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Taking Boston to court and losing, turning a big fine into a bigger fine with costs.
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ginnywings
January 14, 2021, 10:14pm

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Compass FM
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MuddyWaters
January 14, 2021, 10:16pm
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Appointing a shallow self promoting bullshitter.
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promotion plaice
January 14, 2021, 10:17pm

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Wagner singing at BP.


When Leeds trainer Les Cocker was once told Norman Hunter had broken a leg, he asked: “Whose is it?”
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ginnywings
January 14, 2021, 10:17pm

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Alex May.
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MuddyWaters
January 14, 2021, 10:18pm
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Advising Lincoln about relegation to non league.
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ginnywings
January 14, 2021, 10:19pm

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Trust shares.
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Vance Warner
January 14, 2021, 10:20pm
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Farage
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Knut Anders Fosters Voles
January 14, 2021, 10:23pm
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That turtle neck and bowel coloured leather coat combo
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promotion plaice
January 14, 2021, 10:24pm

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There's so many to choose from.


When Leeds trainer Les Cocker was once told Norman Hunter had broken a leg, he asked: “Whose is it?”
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promotion plaice
January 14, 2021, 10:26pm

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Two Town players fighting with each other and both getting sent off.


When Leeds trainer Les Cocker was once told Norman Hunter had broken a leg, he asked: “Whose is it?”
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jaygy
January 14, 2021, 10:29pm
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The whole new ground saga....been rolling on for the best part of 3 decades now and still no nearer
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WOZOFGRIMSBY
January 14, 2021, 10:30pm

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Red baseball caps


Rose is on fire

And your scotch eggs are fu(king vile
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aldi_01
January 14, 2021, 10:30pm

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Deconstructing the child’s flag
Fenty running on the pitch in the fog to get a game abandoned
Marley
Ian Holloway
Blaming everything but ourselves for failures
Serge Makofo
Alex May
Conoco hats
Fenty being held aloft at Bournemouth like some hero
THAT BP video
Advising Lincoln on how to avoid relegation...
Breaking the rules to attract a manager
Fenty sat on his snooker table
THAT lamp...
The countless illiterate ramblings, sorry, statements
Gavin Gunning
Mike Newell
Furloughing the groundsman
The Port Vale fiasco
Dale having a bus of Wrexham turned around on a hunch

I mean the list is endless...


'the poor and the needy are selfish and greedy'...well done Mozza
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Bigdog
January 14, 2021, 10:30pm
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Losing league status above all else but..

The Fan's Forum.. and the club still have it online. What a great advert.. Complete cringefest from start to finish, and with the May revelations, makes Fenty's holier than thou attitude even more hollow than it already seemed at the time..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ueaC76mcsTs
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louth_in_the_south
January 14, 2021, 10:32pm

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The last 16 years


Lower F5
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MuddyWaters
January 14, 2021, 10:33pm
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Sink for the ladies, turtle neck & tan, who scratched my 85k car. Pure Partridge.
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aldi_01
January 14, 2021, 10:37pm

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Quoted from MuddyWaters
Sink for the ladies, turtle neck & tan, who scratched my 85k car. Pure Partridge.


I had the misfortune of being at a corporate type event thing that Fenty attended, I spent all night hoping he ordered a Baileys and began drinking ‘The Ladyboy’...

And that episode of This Time with Alan Partridge when he said the phrase ‘tickled pink’ nearly finished me off...


'the poor and the needy are selfish and greedy'...well done Mozza
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MuddyWaters
January 14, 2021, 10:39pm
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Quoted from aldi_01


I had the misfortune of being at a corporate type event thing that Fenty attended, I spent all night hoping he ordered a Baileys and began drinking ‘The Ladyboy’...

And that episode of This Time with Alan Partridge when he said the phrase ‘tickled pink’ nearly finished me off...


The gift that keeps on giving.
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Rodley Mariner
January 14, 2021, 10:42pm
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Fenty's behaviour at Wembley after we beat FGR. Particularly when he interrupted Bogle's interview by acting like some sort of simpleton to Bogle's clear embarrassment.
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aldi_01
January 14, 2021, 10:43pm

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Quoted from Rodley Mariner
Fenty's behaviour at Wembley after we beat FGR. Particularly when he interrupted Bogle's interview by acting like some sort of simpleton to Bogle's clear embarrassment.


Again, he had previous, remember Spurs at home? flipping cockwomble...


'the poor and the needy are selfish and greedy'...well done Mozza
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promotion plaice
January 14, 2021, 10:44pm

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Day's defence of a serial fraudster.


When Leeds trainer Les Cocker was once told Norman Hunter had broken a leg, he asked: “Whose is it?”
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forza ivano
January 14, 2021, 10:44pm

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Chasetown wasn't one of the greatest moments in my GTFC supporting life
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Knut Anders Fosters Voles
January 14, 2021, 10:44pm
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Quoted from Rodley Mariner
Fenty's behaviour at Wembley after we beat FGR. Particularly when he interrupted Bogle's interview by acting like some sort of simpleton to Bogle's clear embarrassment.


I don’t think he was acting!
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ginnywings
January 14, 2021, 10:51pm

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GTFC 0 - Bath City 2
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Knut Anders Fosters Voles
January 14, 2021, 10:52pm
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I can cope with the football embarrassments like Chasetown, Braintree, Hartlepool, even getting relegated out of the league. That’s part of football and one of the reasons why we all support a smaller club.

What you don’t expect, and the pick axe that chips away at the coal face of Mariner love, is all of the off-the-field humiliations that are listed above. The vast majority of these were completely avoidable and mainly the result of the, frankly weird behaviour of you know who!
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ginnywings
January 14, 2021, 10:52pm

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Defending a scumbag ticket tout because he put a few bob in the coffers.
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KingstonMariner
January 14, 2021, 10:54pm
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Ambulancegate


Through the door there came familiar laughter,
I saw your face and heard you call my name.
Oh my friend we're older but no wiser,
For in our hearts the dreams are still the same.
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ginnywings
January 14, 2021, 10:55pm

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The Mike Parker saga.

Jeez, we could go on all night.  
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ginnywings
January 14, 2021, 10:57pm

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Mighty Mariner and the "matchday mascot experience".
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Bigdog
January 14, 2021, 10:57pm
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Exercise books instead of a computerised system in the year 2020.
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KingstonMariner
January 14, 2021, 10:58pm
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Hijacking the fans’ forum to bully Matt Dean


Through the door there came familiar laughter,
I saw your face and heard you call my name.
Oh my friend we're older but no wiser,
For in our hearts the dreams are still the same.
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promotion plaice
January 14, 2021, 10:59pm

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Extreme Leisure.


When Leeds trainer Les Cocker was once told Norman Hunter had broken a leg, he asked: “Whose is it?”
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KingstonMariner
January 14, 2021, 10:59pm
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Seems like a small thing now but sacking the mascot and charging people to be the mascot


Through the door there came familiar laughter,
I saw your face and heard you call my name.
Oh my friend we're older but no wiser,
For in our hearts the dreams are still the same.
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realist
January 14, 2021, 11:01pm
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Don’t forget the flasks
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KingstonMariner
January 14, 2021, 11:03pm
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Suggesting that RH employees do some unpaid overtime to continue recording an embarrassing shambles of a meeting, with the statement that ‘it’s alright they can have a drink from the bar’.


Through the door there came familiar laughter,
I saw your face and heard you call my name.
Oh my friend we're older but no wiser,
For in our hearts the dreams are still the same.
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Bigdog
January 14, 2021, 11:04pm
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Pointing in a field near Peaks Parkway and proclaiming "spades will be breaking ground in three years time"..
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KingstonMariner
January 14, 2021, 11:05pm
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The owner’s brother posting on here about seeing the win at Cheltenham despite the public* being banned from games.

* last time I looked the only Fenty with an official position is John Shelton.


Through the door there came familiar laughter,
I saw your face and heard you call my name.
Oh my friend we're older but no wiser,
For in our hearts the dreams are still the same.
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Bigdog
January 14, 2021, 11:05pm
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Day's "Championship in five year's time" and "rightful place is top half League One" without having a clue how to get us there..
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KingstonMariner
January 14, 2021, 11:06pm
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Quoted from realist
Don’t forget the flasks


What about the orange?


Through the door there came familiar laughter,
I saw your face and heard you call my name.
Oh my friend we're older but no wiser,
For in our hearts the dreams are still the same.
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KingstonMariner
January 14, 2021, 11:06pm
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Forgetting to renew the drinks licence


Through the door there came familiar laughter,
I saw your face and heard you call my name.
Oh my friend we're older but no wiser,
For in our hearts the dreams are still the same.
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aldi_01
January 14, 2021, 11:06pm

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Remember when his completely disinterested daughter worked in the club shop?

Nick Dale
Shimmying up the floodlights to do a bodge job rather than paying for a professional.

Fenty on the digger at cheapside
Fenty embarrassing himself and the club at Wembley in 2016 doing countless things including dry flipping his Russian bride...in the royal box.
Getting the ticket tout involved
Telling fans raising over 100k and handing it to the club wasn’t important nor influential on our promotion.
Fitness coaches don’t win games
THAT PowerPoint...


'the poor and the needy are selfish and greedy'...well done Mozza
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Bigdog
January 14, 2021, 11:07pm
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Half time "entertainment" a few seasons ago..
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Bigdog
January 14, 2021, 11:08pm
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FGR pitchside arguments with fans..
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aldi_01
January 14, 2021, 11:10pm

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Exter away the other Christmas, massive win for town, Macca played like Banks all game...final whistle goes and that cockwomble appears on the pitch like some flipping idiot...


'the poor and the needy are selfish and greedy'...well done Mozza
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Bigdog
January 14, 2021, 11:10pm
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The "we do our PR on the pitch" while presiding over the worst sustained period of final placings in the whole history of the club..
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KingstonMariner
January 14, 2021, 11:10pm
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I didn’t realise his missus was Russian. Assumed she was Polish. If she’s Russian then she must be his controller, getting him to do stupid things as a minor part (snigger) in the attempt to fracture Western society. 😆


Through the door there came familiar laughter,
I saw your face and heard you call my name.
Oh my friend we're older but no wiser,
For in our hearts the dreams are still the same.
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aldi_01
January 14, 2021, 11:12pm

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Quoted from KingstonMariner
I didn’t realise his missus was Russian. Assumed she was Polish. If she’s Russian then she must be his controller, getting him to do stupid things as a minor part (snigger) in the attempt to fracture Western society. 😆


I mean I completely made that up but I’m sure she’s definitely not a local lass...


'the poor and the needy are selfish and greedy'...well done Mozza
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KingstonMariner
January 14, 2021, 11:14pm
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Quoted from aldi_01


I mean I completely made that up but I’m sure she’s definitely not a local lass...


The name is definitely Slavic in origin. But her dad/grandad might have stayed after the war.


Through the door there came familiar laughter,
I saw your face and heard you call my name.
Oh my friend we're older but no wiser,
For in our hearts the dreams are still the same.
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Rodley Mariner
January 14, 2021, 11:15pm
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The Slade half time, flip chart on the pitch at Lincoln.
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DB
January 14, 2021, 11:21pm
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Holloways game of darts


You can please some of the forumites some of the time but not all the forumites all of the time
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Knut Anders Fosters Voles
January 14, 2021, 11:28pm
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Quoted from KingstonMariner


The name is definitely Slavic in origin. But her dad/grandad might have stayed after the war.


I think you are right. Her maiden name was Pronthepić
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Bigdog
January 14, 2021, 11:28pm
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Boasting of getting Sky tv for the players at Cheapside..
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Bigdog
January 14, 2021, 11:30pm
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Portacabins FFS..
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Knut Anders Fosters Voles
January 14, 2021, 11:31pm
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Filipe Noche
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Bigdog
January 14, 2021, 11:34pm
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Players washing their own kit..
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RonMariner
January 14, 2021, 11:42pm

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It comes to something when forgetting to exercise the option to extend your best player in time (Vernham) doesn't even make the list after 7 pages of member ups!

Wow.

All you can say is

FFS
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Knut Anders Fosters Voles
January 14, 2021, 11:47pm
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When Fenty threatened the Fishy members that he “retained screen scrapes [sic] of the threads” on this forum.

I hope John is screen scraping this thread
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The_Laughing_Mariner
January 14, 2021, 11:47pm
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Same with Martin Paterson


<'(((((<

When I was a little boy
I asked my daddy what would i be
would I be United, would i be Leeds
Here's what he said to me

Oh Grimsby Grimsby
Whatever will be will be
You'll follow then faithfully
Oh Grimsby Grimsby


Tell me Mam me Mam
I dont want no tea no tea
I'm watching the Grimsby
Tell me Mam me mam
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TownSNAFU5
January 14, 2021, 11:48pm
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Scouting the right player and then buying the wrong player.

Or, scouting the wrong player and buying him thinking we had bought somebody else!

Being the first club to be fined for blatant Covid breaches.  Not as if there has not been any warnings

In the 1980s,  the Ramsdens (Directors and supermarket moguls) sold the late great Kevin Moore to Southampton - and threw another player in the deal.  2 for the price of one,  or, buy one get one free.

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RonMariner
January 14, 2021, 11:51pm

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Refusing to buy Joe Waters for £8,000 until the fans chipped in with the cash.
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DB
January 14, 2021, 11:52pm
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considering letting away fans use the pontoon stand


You can please some of the forumites some of the time but not all the forumites all of the time
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Mariner_09
January 14, 2021, 11:59pm
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This is genuinely the most depressing, upsetting, and miserable thread I've read I think. Some stand out for me.

1. THAT Fans' forum! The whole "you lose trust, Matt" exchange plus the JF sycophants in the audience. I think that sticks out as a low point as far as PR is concerned.
2. Closely following that is just the run-up to the sale, Day's defense of May, just conducting sale negotiations in public summed it all up.
3. The Holloway era. The terrible, shocking, unforgivable recruitment, the darts saga. I'm getting angry just writing it out.
4. In terms of football that day at Halifax away stands out for me. Fans chanting "Hursty is a w****r, the whole sage surrounded the alleged racist abuse at Toto after FT. Yes, we had some bad footballing days, Burton, Chasetown, Braintree, Hartlepool, Oldham but in terms of the overall toxicity that stands out for me.

We are a bit of a basketcase it has to be said. No wonder nobody wants to sign for us!


I've wasted my life in black and white, a pathetic act for a worthless cause
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Knut Anders Fosters Voles
January 15, 2021, 12:04am
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Repeated, spurious claims to Ofcom after being called a ‘plonker’ by Radio Humberside

Another defeat for Fenty and further waste of public and Club money. Plonker

The Club’s name tarnished by appearing on the same Ofcom bulletin as withheld complaints about ‘Dangerous Sêx Games’ on Virgin TV and an episode of Casualty where a bomb (possibly hidden in women’s sanitary products) had exploded on a coach, leaving gruesome shots of intestines spilling out of stomachs like the ghastly offal remains of our beloved football club

[url]https://www.ofcom.org.uk/__data/assets/pdf_file/0035/46988/issue99.pdf[/url]
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Poojah
January 15, 2021, 12:05am
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Wow. What an incredible litany of absolute, unadulterated shambolism.

Just when you think it has to stop, it keeps on coming like the medically significant episode of diarrhoea I suffered following a prawn vindaloo I ate at Barnsley’s 17th highest rated Indian restaurant (source: Tripadvisor) a couple of years ago. A deeply unpleasant experience by the way, much like the last sixteen years enduring football’s equivalent of faecal incontinence.

The lack of apparent progress in this transfer window is a stark reminder that the ghost may live on after the witch is dead, but whatever happens we must remember that a club is ultimately defined by its fans rather than its owners - at least at this level. We’ll get back again, should we have to.

Count your blessings in these tough times. The circus tent is being deconstructed.


A smooth sea never made a skillful mariner.
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Boris Johnson
January 15, 2021, 12:06am
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The Goalkeeping Coach with his caravan
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smokey111
January 15, 2021, 12:13am
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Quoted from Boris Johnson
The Goalkeeping Coach with his caravan


???


"The socialism I believe in is everybody working for the same goal and everybody having a share in the rewards. That’s how I see football, that’s how I see life.” Bill Shankly
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ginnywings
January 15, 2021, 12:13am

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The catering at BP, despite being known as Food Town.
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promotion plaice
January 15, 2021, 12:18am

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Being told we had to take the humps out  


When Leeds trainer Les Cocker was once told Norman Hunter had broken a leg, he asked: “Whose is it?”
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ginnywings
January 15, 2021, 12:19am

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The indecipherable tannoy system.
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Bigdog
January 15, 2021, 12:20am
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Quoted from ginnywings
The catering at BP, despite being known as Food Town.


And sponsored by a food company for years..
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Withnail
January 15, 2021, 12:24am
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One of our fans racially abusing one of our own players (opposition player at the time admittedly, not that it makes it rght) then being allowed back into the ground.

Banning BBC Humberside like we're Man United.

Burton away when we were relegated.

Being the worst team in the league pyramid.

Rob Scott. "If ya dant like it dant fackin came".

Convicted fraudster being courted like royalty.

The fans (myself included) being taken in by Holloway.

Treatment of club legend John McDermott.

Lack of progress since promotion in 2016.

Relegation to non league again 2021 (hope I'm wrong)

A 'fan'  in a Man United top, invading the pitch against Barnet in the ill fated 2009/10 season.

The drunbings against Oldham, Braintree and Tranmere.


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Knut Anders Fosters Voles
January 15, 2021, 12:27am
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Breaching employment law and paying out £5,000 to Mike Newell for the pleasure
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Bigdog
January 15, 2021, 12:28am
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This thread is a damning indictment of lack of nous, PR and GTFC brand protection over the years, covering pretty much every single aspect of the club. Really looking forward to seeing what Shutes and Co can do. A few days or a week or two and then this shambolic amateurish era of our club will be finally over..
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TownSNAFU5
January 15, 2021, 12:31am
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Our excellent pitch turned into a ploughed field as the groundsman was laid off to save money.

Selling Danny (forget surname) because we would not offer about £50 a week more.  He had a very good career at Palace.

Only having one pre-season friendly.

Being based in the wrong town.

Having a website where you cannot order what you want to buy.  I gave up.

Double booking seats for matches.
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Knut Anders Fosters Voles
January 15, 2021, 12:32am
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The (alleged) ‘Rumble in the Pub Car Park’ between the majority shareholder and the first team manager.

Grimsby Pete takes up the story, “It was a sorry sight to see men goading them on in such a barbaric fashion. And I'm rather ashamed to say I was party to that goading. And two men fighting as I saw in that car park that night, naked as the day they were born, and fighting the way God intended. Wrestling at points, I don't know if you've seen "Women In Love". There's a marvellous scene by the fire....... It kind of resembled that.”
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TownSNAFU5
January 15, 2021, 12:34am
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Our excellent pitch turned into a ploughed field as the groundsman was laid off to save money.

Selling Danny (forget surname) because we would not offer about £50 a week more.  He had a very good career at Palace.

Only having one pre-season friendly.

Being based in the wrong town.

Having a website where you cannot order what you want to buy.  I gave up.

Double booking seats for matches.
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TownSNAFU5
January 15, 2021, 12:37am
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FAC replay at home to lower-league team and part-timers Salisbury.  Extre-time.   We take the lead in ET.

Salisbury still beat us!!  Without penalties.
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Bigdog
January 15, 2021, 12:40am
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The board's answer to shift workers and exiles loyalty. Much heralded (by them) Self Select ticketing scheme. Overly complicated, buy twelve games get one free. Completely absurd and taken up by less than 20 fans..
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Knut Anders Fosters Voles
January 15, 2021, 1:04am
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Our majority shareholder getting a driving ban for various offences, including speeding, and then using his position as Ward councillor to claim, “there is no appetite at all among locals for a speed limit reduction along Humberston Avenue”.

Instead of worrying about road safety, NE Lincs Council should “focus more on things like the grass verges”.  
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Kris2
January 15, 2021, 2:06am
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Summoning fans to "meetings" where they bring print outs of things they said on a fans forum and bully them into an apology or worse, threatening legal action against the forums to get their own way. I can't think of another club where this has happened.
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137
January 15, 2021, 3:03am
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Quoted from Mariner_09
This is genuinely the most depressing, upsetting, and miserable thread I've read I think. Some stand out for me.

1. THAT Fans' forum! The whole "you lose trust, Matt" exchange plus the JF sycophants in the audience. I think that sticks out as a low point as far as PR is concerned.
2. Closely following that is just the run-up to the sale, Day's defense of May, just conducting sale negotiations in public summed it all up.
3. The Holloway era. The terrible, shocking, unforgivable recruitment, the darts saga. I'm getting angry just writing it out.
4. In terms of football that day at Halifax away stands out for me. Fans chanting "Hursty is a w****r, the whole sage surrounded the alleged racist abuse at Toto after FT. Yes, we had some bad footballing days, Burton, Chasetown, Braintree, Hartlepool, Oldham but in terms of the overall toxicity that stands out for me.

We are a bit of a basketcase it has to be said. No wonder nobody wants to sign for us!


I'm looking at the thread rather differently...this is good therapy for us all. We need to get over JF's regime somehow. (PTSD)

There's a book waiting to be written, perhaps entitled 'The Tinpot Tyrant's Tantrums' . Fun reading for fans of other clubs...
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KingstonMariner
January 15, 2021, 4:08am
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Quoted from Kris2
Summoning fans to "meetings" where they bring print outs of things they said on a fans forum and bully them into an apology or worse, threatening legal action against the forums to get their own way. I can't think of another club where this has happened.


If anyone gets summoned again, they can print this thread, pop it in his lap and say ‘I rest my case, meeting over.’


Through the door there came familiar laughter,
I saw your face and heard you call my name.
Oh my friend we're older but no wiser,
For in our hearts the dreams are still the same.
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GollyGTFC
January 15, 2021, 6:40am

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Our majority shareholder getting a driving ban for various offences, including speeding, and then using his position as Ward councillor to claim, “there is no appetite at all among locals for a speed limit reduction along Humberston Avenue”.

Instead of worrying about road safety, NE Lincs Council should “focus more on things like the grass verges”.  


I think my dad has told the story on here himself but...

When Fenty got banned from driving (2005ish?) he still used to walk around the stands before a match rather than across the pitch. The game after his driving ban he was walking down the front of the Pontoon.

He was walking towards my dad. My dad held his hand out to Fenty like he was going to shake his hand and said “hello, Mr Fenty”. When Fenty extended his hand out to shake my dads hand my dad just placed a concealed taxi business card into his hand and said something along the lines of “I thought you might need this”.

Still the funniest thing I’ve ever witnessed my dad do.
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Les Brechin
January 15, 2021, 8:00am

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THAT day at Burton.

Firstly the performance of the team on the pitch. I know we would have gone down even if we'd won but the majority of the players played like they couldn't give a toss.

Then the actions of our so-called "fans" after the game. I was certainly embarrassed to be a Town fan that day.

Also shoutouts for Chasetown and the 5-0 at Braintree.  Thankfully I wasn't at Braintree that night as that was the day I had my main brain tumour op. I thought I was still under the anesthetic when I heard the score the next morning.


[img]https://news.images.itv.com/image/file/402260/image_update_img.jpg[/img]
OFFICIAL FUNDRAISER FOR THE BRAIN TUMOUR CHARITY
TOTAL AMOUNT RAISED SINCE AUGUST 2008 £16613.24


LATEST DONATION - FROM DONATION FROM THE FISHY FORUM - AUG 2023 AMOUNT RAISED £170.00
        
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Mallyner
January 15, 2021, 8:02am
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Quoted from KingstonMariner


The name is definitely Slavic in origin. But her dad/grandad might have stayed after the war.


I once heard that JF had complained that his wife took a week to hoover the lounge. So, either he has a massive lounge or she is a Slovak.  



Supporting Town for 65 years.  
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Davec
January 15, 2021, 8:02am
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Quoted from Kris2
Summoning fans to "meetings" where they bring print outs of things they said on a fans forum and bully them into an apology or worse, threatening legal action against the forums to get their own way. I can't think of another club where this has happened.


He summoned me once but I never turned up, he then sent me an email after my non attendance and said he would have to take it further.

This was in 2017 and I still haven't heard anything
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Abdul19
January 15, 2021, 8:13am

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Quoted from GollyGTFC


I think my dad has told the story on here himself but...

When Fenty got banned from driving (2005ish?) he still used to walk around the stands before a match rather than across the pitch. The game after his driving ban he was walking down the front of the Pontoon.

He was walking towards my dad. My dad held his hand out to Fenty like he was going to shake his hand and said “hello, Mr Fenty”. When Fenty extended his hand out to shake my dads hand my dad just placed a concealed taxi business card into his hand and said something along the lines of “I thought you might need this”.

Still the funniest thing I’ve ever witnessed my dad do.


When John tried that trick he gave a paper cut to a man from Nestlé.


JESUS AT THE CENTRE
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Abdul19
January 15, 2021, 8:14am

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Quoted from ginnywings
The catering at BP, despite being known as Food Town.


JF walking past the Pontoon eating a burger.


JESUS AT THE CENTRE
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grimsby pete
January 15, 2021, 8:30am

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Has to be the 5-0 defeat at Braintree forms the only time I felt embarrassed being a town fan.

Plus Fenty climbing up the floodlight pylon and NOT falling off.


                             Over 36 years living in Suffolk but always a mariner.
                             68 Years following the Town

                              Life member of Trust

                               First game   April 1955
                               
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Gainsbro_Mariner
January 15, 2021, 8:51am

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In terms of away from incidents that have happened internally...

* Being relegated from the Football League

* Watching our club stand still in time where smaller and once less organised clubs have gone on to build stadiums, be progressive and are now, bigger and richer and in higher leagues.

* Watching Non-League sides with tiny fan bases such as Fleetwood, Accrington, Burton etc join the league, become solid sides, get promoted and sit in the League above whilst we struggle with a pot to urine in.

* Every time we lost a game at Non-League level.

* Watching Lincoln and previously Scunthorpe get is so right on the field whilst again we get everything consistently wrong.

* Teams like Boston United being able to plan and then build a stadium within 2 or 3 years, whilst 20 years later we are no closer.

* Year after year of uninspiring poor to average football.




Tony Gallimore nicked my Pint and my sausage roll
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BlackandWhiteBarmy2
January 15, 2021, 9:22am
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Having your chairman state publicly that we would not be greatly affected by the ITV Digital fiasco because we'd made provisions, or not spent the money before we had it, only to have it wheeled out as an excuse for all our financial woes, including debts to tyrants, for the next 20 flipping years.

Ambulancegate

Newellgate

Radio Humbersidegate

Fentys fireside chats, you know, the ones were he blames the fans and ITV digital because he's embarrassed the club, again.

Burton

Tranmere

Alex May

Trust shares

Shut up

Aswad Thomas racist fan ban.

the list is almost endless

Someone needs to do a Billy Joel We didn't start the Fire GTFC edit.


And when you fall back into the mud it hurts a lot.
No! None of it was true, none of those things we thought we could see existed at all.
All that was really there was still more misery

Emile Zola
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Gainsbro_Mariner
January 15, 2021, 9:51am

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It's fair to say as well that being an 80's kid and growing up watching Town from 92/93 ish and having been so spoilt in that era, it's embarrassing that the club went to excrement so quickly after going down in 2003.

When you think about some of the players we had, the way we held our own in the Championship and the way we operated as a club and the challenges we beat it's sad that this club has gone on to suffer from miss-management, no guidance, no ambition for so long.


Tony Gallimore nicked my Pint and my sausage roll
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MuddyWaters
January 15, 2021, 9:52am
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Quoted from 137


I'm looking at the thread rather differently...this is good therapy for us all. We need to get over JF's regime somehow. (PTSD)

There's a book waiting to be written, perhaps entitled 'The Tinpot Tyrant's Tantrums' . Fun reading for fans of other clubs...


There’s enough on here for at least Volume 2.
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NorfolkImp
January 15, 2021, 10:00am
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Quoted from Bristol Mariner
I'm sure many clubs go through periods of turmoil, ups and downs etc but surely we must lead the way in embarrassing/cringeworthy moments.

Thought a list would be an idea just if anything else to think it can't get any worse - can it?

Like those awful channel 5 countdown programmes (ie top funniest football moments).

So to start the ball rolling here's a few that spring to mind, left a few out Could probably do a Fenty one all on it's own!

I'll do a poll in a week or so to find the number 1 most embarrassing GTFC moment.

1. Laws fracturing Bonetti's cheekbone with a plate of chicken
2. Fenty snapping a kids flag
3. Fenty accusing women of disguising tampons as fireworks
4. Newell's team of pissheads
5. Holloway playing darts during covid lockdown
6. Nick Dale not heeding police advise and we get £15k fine against Port Vale, far more than extra stewards would have cost
7. Board member Marley telling fans to shut up at an event designed to bring fans and club together


Slade & the players with his tactics board in the centre circle at half-time at Sinny Bank, whilst we all pi$$ed ourselves laughing, deserves a mention surely?  





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Mandy Dunnit vs Hettie
January 15, 2021, 10:10am

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Quoted from NorfolkImp


Slade & the players with his tactics board in the centre circle at half-time at Sinny Bank, whilst we all pi$$ed ourselves laughing, deserves a mention surely?  



It has been, now does us a favour and pi$$ off back to ‘Sinny Bank’, this is our misery and we don’t need anyone else to wallow in it...
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lew chaterleys lover
January 15, 2021, 10:17am
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Quoted from ginnywings
The Mike Parker saga.

Jeez, we could go on all night.  


..and morning.

The thing is, these are all the ones in the public domain. The stories I used to hear when in business meetings would leave you either very angry or collapsing with laughter or both.
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Dan
January 15, 2021, 10:32am

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What about the orange.


Quoted from John Fenty, April 2013
I deconstructed the flag to the point where it was safe and couldn’t be considered a danger
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RichMariner
January 15, 2021, 11:57am
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Couple of gentle ones:

Fenty calling Radio Humberside telling them to stop asking questions (and then calling our manager 'Rob Hurst').

Telling players to get a part-time job in the summer.

Official website publishing directions to Southport for a friendly at Gainsborough.


"Don't shine that light in my face, mate - I've just lost a pint of blood."
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RonMariner
January 15, 2021, 12:08pm

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A gobsmacking indictment of the way this club has been mismanaged. The majority of examples from the last 16 years.

We should print the list off and send it to the board room with  a note to say 'This is your legacy'.
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January 15, 2021, 12:10pm
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Being the first club in the 'second division' to go out of the FA Cup in the first round.

Getting hammered on Boxing Day at Barnsley in the pouring rain on an open stand only to discover that the players had had a massive Christmas Eve party at Crofty's and were all still getting over it.

Blundell Park - it's an embarrassment.


Miss Scunthorpe. Not a beauty pageant, just sound advice.
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TownSNAFU5
January 15, 2021, 12:13pm
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Having a"Chairman" who is formally "Not the Chairman", "Chairman", but behaved as the Chairman still.

An anecdote from just before WW2, or during the start of WW2". Grimsby drew a match in a cup competion.  There was no time to arrange a replay.  The Cup Organisers awarded the tie to our opponents on the basis of an assessment:

"Grimsby would probably have the lost the replay anyway".  
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diehardmariner
January 15, 2021, 12:16pm
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Quoted from Les Brechin
THAT day at Burton.

Firstly the performance of the team on the pitch. I know we would have gone down even if we'd won but the majority of the players played like they couldn't give a toss.

Then the actions of our so-called "fans" after the game. I was certainly embarrassed to be a Town fan that day.


Aye, very difficult to argue with that.  

But for the vast majority of these moments, there's a very common theme running through them all...

Not sure if they've been listed already but just to add:

Our chairman waving like a madman on the touchline to get the game against Rushden & Diamonds called off due to fog.

Our chairman taking the Play Off Trophy in his (presumably not yet scratched) car to the service station on the way to the FA Trophy final, practically sprawling across his bonnet for photos with it in the worst emulation of a Max Power show I've ever seen.

But I think the most cringeworthy moment of the football club has to revolve around a former board member demanding he get some time on the pitch in a competitive fixture...
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BobbyCummingsTackle
January 15, 2021, 12:21pm
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I'm on a roll now...

Any team Nicky Law put out.

Mike Lyons starting games as a striker.


Miss Scunthorpe. Not a beauty pageant, just sound advice.
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BobbyCummingsTackle
January 15, 2021, 12:22pm
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Quoted from TownSNAFU5
Having a"Chairman" who is formally "Not the Chairman", "Chairman", but behaved as the Chairman still.

An anecdote from just before WW2, or during the start of WW2". Grimsby drew a match in a cup competion.  There was no time to arrange a replay.  The Cup Organisers awarded the tie to our opponents on the basis of an assessment:

"Grimsby would probably have the lost the replay anyway".  


I've never heard that before, it is true it is f*cking brilliant! Thank you for sharing that. It made me laugh.


Miss Scunthorpe. Not a beauty pageant, just sound advice.
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diehardmariner
January 15, 2021, 12:24pm
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Quoted from TownSNAFU5


Selling Danny (forget surname) because we would not offer about £50 a week more.  He had a very good career at Palace.




Butterfield.

If only we had sold him....

Summer of 2001, Palace made a bid of £1million.  Which we rejected.

Over the course of the next 12 months we failed to make a single offer to renew his contract.  As Butterfield was under 24, the ruling at the time was that to make sure we would receive compensation if he left, we had to evidence we had made an offer to improve his contract.  Even if it was by 1p.

Butterfield was hot property and was always going to leave.  The club decided it wasn't worth trying to keep him so didn't make a single offer to better his contract.  Not even a gesture offer.  Palace picked up him up a on freebie.

Butterfield then went onto miss just a single game in the next two seasons, culminating in Palace reaching the Premier League.  At the same time we had just completed back-to-back relegations into the fourth tier...
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LH
January 15, 2021, 12:29pm

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Quite a specific time frame for most of these isn’t there?
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KingstonMariner
January 15, 2021, 12:45pm
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Quoted from Mallyner


I once heard that JF had complained that his wife took a week to hoover the lounge. So, either he has a massive lounge or she is a Slovak.  



😆 I’m having that one! My wife’s friend is Slovakian so I’ve got the perfect excuse to use it.


Through the door there came familiar laughter,
I saw your face and heard you call my name.
Oh my friend we're older but no wiser,
For in our hearts the dreams are still the same.
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Azimuth
January 15, 2021, 1:06pm
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This is one of the most entertaining threads I have ever read on the fishy, if you didnt laugh you would cry or worse.
What happened with "the orange" ?
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BobbyCummingsTackle
January 15, 2021, 1:09pm
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Quoted from Azimuth
This is one of the most entertaining threads I have ever read on the fishy, if you didnt laugh you would cry or worse.
What happened with "the orange" ?


He's going to be impeached.


Miss Scunthorpe. Not a beauty pageant, just sound advice.
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KingstonMariner
January 15, 2021, 1:17pm
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He's going to be impeached.


😂


Through the door there came familiar laughter,
I saw your face and heard you call my name.
Oh my friend we're older but no wiser,
For in our hearts the dreams are still the same.
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WHYWONTYOULETMESIGNUP
January 15, 2021, 1:22pm
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Quoted from ginnywings
The indecipherable tannoy system.


When we tried to fix it with a precarious stack of giant speakers and deafened fans until 2 minutes after kick off
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RonMariner
January 15, 2021, 1:48pm

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This thread would be funny, if not for the fact that its actually very tragic.

The club we love has become a shambles and a laughing stock. Think back to 1998. We had a great manager, a great team, and we were returning to what had become our natural home, the championship.

We were famed for punching above our weight, and for playing attractive attacking football.

We had recent victories at Stamford Bridge, St James Park, Goodison, Bramhall Lane, Hillsborough, and would go on to win at Anfield.

The town was rightly proud of its football club.

But look where we are now, what we have become. It is mortifying.    
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GollyGTFC
January 15, 2021, 2:04pm

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The first 23 seasons I lived through (I turned 40 last October) we spent...

18 seasons - Championship
3 seasons - League One
2 seasons - League Two


...and then Fenty came along.
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londonmariner2
January 15, 2021, 2:16pm
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Still having to queue up for tickets
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Bristol Mariner
January 15, 2021, 2:20pm

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Quoted from RichMariner
Couple of gentle ones:

Fenty calling Radio Humberside telling them to stop asking questions (and then calling our manager 'Rob Hurst').

Telling players to get a part-time job in the summer.

Official website publishing directions to Southport for a friendly at Gainsborough.


classics!


GTFC Exile, Bristol Mariners
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BobbyCummingsTackle
January 15, 2021, 2:26pm
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Quoted from RonMariner
This thread would be funny, if not for the fact that its actually very tragic.

The club we love has become a shambles and a laughing stock. Think back to 1998. We had a great manager, a great team, and we were returning to what had become our natural home, the championship.

We were famed for punching above our weight, and for playing attractive attacking football.

We had recent victories at Stamford Bridge, St James Park, Goodison, Bramhall Lane, Hillsborough, and would go on to win at Anfield.

The town was rightly proud of its football club.

But look where we are now, what we have become. It is mortifying.    


A brief story that backs this up:

After the Wimbledon FA Cup game me and 2 mates were in a pub not far from Covent Garden. A bunch of Chelsea fans walked in who were a bit lippy and started asking guys what games they'd been to. When they came to us we were a little bit worried that we would get a hiding (we were all lovers, not fighters). When we said we were Grimsby fans we firstly got congratulated for how hard our supporters were (!) and then were congratulated for the football we played and how nobody fancied playing us.

Allied to this, my best mate is a season ticket holder at Everton. For many years he dreaded the draw for the 3rd round of the FA Cup in case they drew us because he was convinced that we would beat them and he would never hear the last of it from me. In any conversation about football with others the great Everton side in the 80's would be brought up and everybody would get all frothy about Peter Reid et al but he would never make eye contact with me because he knew I would bring up how we beat that team at Goodison.

For any Town fans under the age of 30 - that's what it used to be like supporting Town. It was f*cking great.


Miss Scunthorpe. Not a beauty pageant, just sound advice.
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Gainsbro_Mariner
January 15, 2021, 2:34pm

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Serge Makofo saga.... wasn't he signed on a 3 year deal by Woods and then after a couple of weeks they said they had signed the wrong player and we had to pay him out his contract when he eventually left.


Tony Gallimore nicked my Pint and my sausage roll
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TAGG
January 15, 2021, 2:48pm

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There have been to many to list(all involving Fenty)

The most embarrassing were the photos of May walking into BP and sitting on Days knee in the Directors box.


In his three stints as Grimsby Town manager spanning over 10 years the club was never relegated and he also guided them to three promotions.
Only 14 managers have reached 1,000 matches in charge of a Football League team by 1998 and Buckley is one of them.
GOD
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Knut Anders Fosters Voles
January 15, 2021, 2:54pm
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Rumour has it that, such was the despair around the club in the initial days of Fenty’s reign, it ruined lives, the turtle neck market and at least one Mariner marriage.

I often wonder whether, without Fenty, Stacy and Steph Coldicott would still be together, still breaking boundaries as the ultimate Midlands power couple.

Instead we are left with nothing but bittersweet memories, legal bills and grainy recordings of Steph Coldicott on Big Brother 4.
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BobbyCummingsTackle
January 15, 2021, 4:14pm
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Rumour has it that, such was the despair around the club in the initial days of Fenty’s reign, it ruined lives, the turtle neck market and at least one Mariner marriage.

I often wonder whether, without Fenty, Stacy and Steph Coldicott would still be together, still breaking boundaries as the ultimate Midlands power couple.

Instead we are left with nothing but bittersweet memories, legal bills and grainy recordings of Steph Coldicott on Big Brother 4.


I want a pint of what you're drinking  


Miss Scunthorpe. Not a beauty pageant, just sound advice.
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Bristol Mariner
January 15, 2021, 4:21pm

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I want a pint of what you're drinking  


snap, must be brewed by monks


GTFC Exile, Bristol Mariners
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lew chaterleys lover
January 15, 2021, 5:51pm
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Quoted from Azimuth
This is one of the most entertaining threads I have ever read on the fishy, if you didnt laugh you would cry or worse.
What happened with "the orange" ?


I believe it refers to when we beat (a full strength) Tottenham. In the scenes in the dressing room after the game he screamed: "don't forget the orange" or some such. It was like the embarrassing uncle at the Christmas party who completely misreads the situation.

I remember me and the kids laughing out loud when it happened as it was so out of context.
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Limerick Mariner
January 15, 2021, 6:22pm
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Signing Scott McGarvey
Scott McGarvey threatening the lower Findus terrace
Mike Lyons, Bobby Roberts and Mike Newell.
Having to consult google maps to find out where our opponents are from

Most embarrassing moment for me is not seeing through Ian Holloway earlier. Going to work in Nottingham after Burton and being asked if I could turn violent...

Some games I attended:-
Losing to Gateshead in the Cup in the mid-70s (as a child I was spoilt by Lawrie Mc's team).
Losing to Halifax in the Cup one freezing night
Taking my 3 children to see us lose 4-1 at Rushden in the conference (I didn't go to Braintree).

Other games - losing to a team where football is minority sport - Bath. Braintree etc...
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RonMariner
January 15, 2021, 6:41pm

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I wouldn't trust the people running this club for the past decade to sit the right way round on a toilet seat.
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ska face
January 16, 2021, 10:31am

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When, in response to a town fan racially abusing a black opposition player, the Stadium Manager issued a statement saying the perpetrator “will be banned from our ground for life” - then club officials facilitated a meeting between the abuser and her victim, and stated that was “the end of the matter from the club’s point of view”. The abuser freely attends matches now.

https://archive.kickitout.org/news/grimsby-town-fan-on-racism-charge-not-banned/#.YAK88aTfXDs
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St. Pauli
January 16, 2021, 12:48pm

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A user named GETYOURFACTSRIGHT on a fans message board, turned out to be the clubs major shareholder, after several postings ...
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Azimuth
January 16, 2021, 12:59pm
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I believe it refers to when we beat (a full strength) Tottenham. In the scenes in the dressing room after the game he screamed: "don't forget the orange" or some such. It was like the embarrassing uncle at the Christmas party who completely misreads the situation.

I remember me and the kids laughing out loud when it happened as it was so out of context.


Ahh yes I remember that incident now, poured over Slade wasnt it.
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Davec
January 16, 2021, 1:07pm
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Quoted from Azimuth


Ahh yes I remember that incident now, poured over Slade wasnt it.


Yes as he was giving an interview to Sky.

I'm all for a bit of fun but it was live on TV, whilst beating a full strength spurs team is an achievement surely the celebrations and clown acts when the TV cameras aren't filming is more professional than letting the entire country see it.
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NorthLondonMariner
January 16, 2021, 1:22pm
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Away at Burton, 8th May 2010
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TownSNAFU5
January 16, 2021, 1:51pm
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NL home games when small, PT teams parked the bus and left with a point.

Numerous teams who could only fill a minibus with away fans.

Selling any profilic striker for peanuts.  Even the tribunal conspired against us for Kevin Drinkell's (very low) transfer fee.  (I think that Glasgow Rangers, money bags team at the time, bought Kevin as their first signing.  

A club thought of so badly by refs, that at Wembley in a play-off final, the ref gave the other team a fresh start because we were dominating too early in the game.     Sort it  Fenty.  

Even Hitler waited until we were the cream of the "Prem" before starting a world war.  Which scewed us up bigtime.
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jaygy
January 16, 2021, 1:52pm
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Not sorting out a contract dispute with our manager before a playoff final which meant the manager rested one of our best players for the game(whom he was looking to sign for his next club) and thousands of fans travelled to the millennium stadium to see our team play terribly and look totally confused at the whole situation
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Civvy at last
January 16, 2021, 2:39pm

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Quoted from NorfolkImp


Slade & the players with his tactics board in the centre circle at half-time at Sinny Bank, whilst we all pi$$ed ourselves laughing, deserves a mention surely?  



Yes And it happened in front of a sell out away crowd.

Had the same happened at BP to your lot, there would only have been 4 or 5 hundred Gimps to witness it.


The wife was going away for a girly weekend.
I jokingly remarked  'I don't know whether to spend it watching porn or watching football'
'you may as well spend it watching porn' she replied
That's understanding darling what makes you say that? I asked

She said 'Well you already know how to play football'  
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KingstonMariner
January 16, 2021, 3:24pm
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Quoted from TownSNAFU5
NL home games when small, PT teams parked the bus and left with a point.

Numerous teams who could only fill a minibus with away fans.

Selling any profilic striker for peanuts.  Even the tribunal conspired against us for Kevin Drinkell's (very low) transfer fee.  (I think that Glasgow Rangers, money bags team at the time, bought Kevin as their first signing.  

A club thought of so badly by refs, that at Wembley in a play-off final, the ref gave the other team a fresh start because we were dominating too early in the game.     Sort it  Fenty.  

Even Hitler waited until we were the cream of the "Prem" before starting a world war.  Which scewed us up bigtime.


Drinkell went to Norwich first.


Through the door there came familiar laughter,
I saw your face and heard you call my name.
Oh my friend we're older but no wiser,
For in our hearts the dreams are still the same.
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Croxton
January 16, 2021, 5:13pm
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Williams/ Neymar. Gutless and a disgrace to Wales.
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Madeleymariner
January 16, 2021, 5:15pm

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Todays game, I thought we were supposed to be a [/b]football[b] club
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Zero_as_a_limit
January 16, 2021, 5:19pm
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The people given football banning orders after the pitch invasiaion at Burton in 2010 being told they could only return to Blundell Park if they bought a season ticket:

https://www.grimsbytelegraph.c.....28-detail/story.html

(can't remember if the club later relented on this).
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Supersixty
January 16, 2021, 5:33pm
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40 floodlights taken down and sold as GTFC memorabilia, not on ebay, the club shop, market place, nope took to Johns brothers auction house so he got his 20%, wonder how many sold with there 200 reserve price
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KingstonMariner
January 16, 2021, 7:48pm
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Quoted from Supersixty
40 floodlights taken down and sold as GTFC memorabilia, not on ebay, the club shop, market place, nope took to Johns brothers auction house so he got his 20%, wonder how many sold with there 200 reserve price


I did not know the. Club property so the total should be knocked off the debt.


Through the door there came familiar laughter,
I saw your face and heard you call my name.
Oh my friend we're older but no wiser,
For in our hearts the dreams are still the same.
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Supersixty
January 16, 2021, 8:43pm
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You've more chance of knitting fog
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KingstonMariner
January 16, 2021, 9:47pm
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Quoted from Supersixty
You've more chance of knitting fog


I agree.


Through the door there came familiar laughter,
I saw your face and heard you call my name.
Oh my friend we're older but no wiser,
For in our hearts the dreams are still the same.
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aldi_01
January 17, 2021, 7:09am

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I did not know that about the flood lights but naturally, I am not surprised.

Wasn’t there also an issue when the ‘new’ flood lights were fitted regarding the cherry picker and a right royal intercourse about for the flood life in the main stand/ozzy corner?


'the poor and the needy are selfish and greedy'...well done Mozza
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mariner83
January 17, 2021, 9:40am

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What's the limit on the number of posts a thread can handle?
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