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Cod Widow's Diary Week 14
By: Chez Osborne
Danger. This is a pre-boring week alert. Sadman has a week off. How am I going to cope, my 'dealer' is out of valium and mogodon. There is no chance of a proper diary this week as its far too busy but I will do what I can.
Mon 18th Dec
He went out last night and came home pissed. Nowt wrong in that but he is very annoying when he's had a drink. He pretends to like the cat, me and the kids. Then he starts singing (out of tune) Town songs. Sometimes he starts on the karaoke from the Fishy. Anyway,he did a 'Swin'. He fell off the chair and hurt himself. Now, I'm patient, kind, caring and honest. But I am not a nurse, so piss off sadman and lick your own wounds my boy.
Tues 19th Dec.
I have a headache and my arm hurts he mutters. Like I care? His brain has gone too, he actually spent some money today. He went Xmas shopping on his own. I don't know what he bought but the first thing he showed me was 2 tickets to the game on Boxing Day. Think I will shoot him now. That's not xmas shopping, it's sad.
I forgot to say, he did a good deed the other day. He won some prizes in a Xmas draw and gave them to a pensioner. Very kind I thought, not like him though. Usually tightfisted sad git that only thinks of Town. (wonder why he didnt give it to the club,he gives em all his bloody time).
Wed 20th Dec
Nicko went out all afternoon, probs with the car. He should try walking then, instead of moaning. Then again, he is a sadman. Off out for a Indian tonight with Mr and Mrs Pirate, hope we get to taste the naan bread and not his cutlass.
Thurs 21st Dec
There is no way I would betray a confidence, but I am a woman so here goes. The meal with Mr and Mrs Pirate was good but the small talk was better. Apparently the 'Pirate' likes to wear womens' clothes, he was well impressed with wearing his wifes leggings and stilleto's, though I think a meal out with friends is not the right place,hehehehehe. Sadman even got a pic of him at his best, lol.
Nicko has spent most of today on the PC so I won't be talking to him all tomorrow. All's fair in love 'n' war as they say. Anyway, I could do with a rest from him, he's been doing my head in all week so far.
The sad git's even going in Town later to see the players at the club shop. He see's them all the time and now this. Well I for one don't think its healthy and will be taking action if it continues.I don't mind his rantings about the club but he wants to get rid of RG and replace him with the Mighty Mariner, time for action I think.
Its nearly Christmas so I will retire for the rest of the week. It's far too busy, as you can imagine, so the diary will be taking a week's break. I do hope you don't mind. I saw Billo was doing a speech,so I thought I would do a poem about my beloved sadman.
Christmas is coming
sadmans getting fat
he's always damn anoying
but then he's a sad little twat.
He wakes up every morning
with a smile upon his face
he's scratching and a yawning
and he looks a bloody disgrace.
For Swin and Stu
and all the others too
I'll see you in the chatroom
where Town fans rendevous.
I have to mention Pirate
who's on 'the other side'
he deserted the fishy
and will be going in the 'tide'.
Its time for me to go now
but dont have any fear
the diary will continue
straight after the new year.
I wish all my readers a very merry Xmas and a prosperous new year. Cya,
Chez (THE Codwidow)
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